There are still a few things in life that you cannot buy your way out of. One of them is a hangover. Even the most disciplined among us occasionally drink just a wee bit too much from time to time. Like say, on New Year’s Eve. It’s only a few weeks away, and we want to be prepared. And so, we went in search of the ultimate remedies for a hangover. If money were no object, what are the best luxury hangover cures and fast headache remedies that actually work? Our experts weigh in on the most effective (and expensive) hangover cures right now, just in time for NYE and the holiday season.
the hangover: a common ailment the world over
Hangovers happen. The French call the condition gueule de bois (“wooden mouth”).
Are there hangover cures and quick remedies that actually work? Why, yes, there are, dear reader.
But we think the Scottish poet laureate Robert Burns described the dilemma most eloquently: he apparently reported feeling “ramfeezled and forswense.”
We feel you, man.
And yes, abstainers, we hear you saying the best hangover cure is not drinking in the first place. Have some compassion for your fellow humans who choose not to take that path, or who occasionally stumble off of it, and bear with us. And thanks for being designated drivers, by the way.
if money is no object, what are the best, most effective, luxury hangover cures?
We surveyed our luxury class friends all over the world, and this is what we found. As fellow Wolf Pack members, we suggest that you read this now, and plan accordingly. You’ll want everything in easy reach. By tomorrow morning, it’ll be too late.
old school hangover cures that seem to actually work
1. hair of the dog
Let’s start with the old school. Everyone has been told that the “hair of the dog” is the best hangover cure. Meaning: drink more alcohol!
Where did that logic come from? Well apparently, the English expression is a shortening of “a hair of the dog that bit you,” and it comes from an old belief that someone bitten by a rabid dog could be cured of rabies by putting some of the dog’s hair inside the wound. Yikes!
Of course you could drink more. You could even go all Ernest Hemingway pre-prohibition, and mix up a Corpse Reviver (vermouth, Calvados, and Cognac) or a Corpse Reviver #2 (Cointreau, gin, lemon juice, Lillet, and absinthe). It would be a grand gesture, but potentially a tragic one – a rather fruitless way of kicking the can down the road.
The best most effective (and expensive) luxury NYE hangover cures and quick remedies that actually work available now.
2. Eat something. And don’t drink some things.
Of course, there are other old school remedies that have passionate and loyal followings.
A big greasy breakfast; Alka-Seltzer; a Prairie Oyster Cocktail (raw egg, Worcestershire and Tabasco sauces, salt and pepper); umeboshi (a pickled fruit from Japan); and haejangguk (a spicy “hangover soup” from South Korea).
The ancient Romans believed eating a fried canary would help; the Greeks opted for cabbage. We’ll take a hard pass. Thanks.
It’s said that avoiding darker-colored drinks (like red wine and bourbon) will lead to a less painful hangover. Urban Legend? You decide.
3. Beg for divine intervention
If you find yourself in Romania, you might consider a prayer to Saint Vivian, the country’s Patron Saint of the hungover.
The best most effective and expensive luxury NYE hangover cures and quick remedies that actually work available now.
4. follow 007’s secret cure
After having too many martinis – shaken, not stirred – Daniel Craig, aka James Bond himself, cites Pedialyte (used by parents for generations to rehydrate their stomach flu-sick children) as his magic cure. Maybe this is the year you give it a try.
our expert panel weighs in on hangover cures that actually work
Here’s what our Dandelion Chandelier panel of elite experts recommends:
5. swiss ingenuity
Our Swiss bureau chief reports: “If hangover hits, I think the best way to cure it is to drink a few glasses of water; I add a spoon of sea salt or Himalayan salt. Exercising to sweat out the poison or spending time in the sauna/steam bath also helps. A Bloody Mary is also a good cure, but the effect is somewhat short-lived.”
6. clearing the fog the bay area way
From the Bay Area comes this, from one of our sophisticated friends: “The best remedy for hangover is DripDrop Hydration Powder, invented by a physician here in San Francisco. You mix it (preferably) with a big glass of water before you go to bed (or pass out). Of course it’s primarily used for dehydrated refugees/war/natural disaster victims. But it’s remarkably effective on hangovers, too.”
7. red carpet remedy
Our LA correspondent swears by cold pressed green juice and a cold shower. Cold everything! Got it?
8. mad science
Our Head of Research is a firm believer in drinking a glass of water with an Emergen-C before commencing the libations to maximize vitamins C and B. Why? We have no idea. Just trust the science.
9. an organic cleanse
Our cousin, the millennial, chimed in with Lime Ginger Juice From BluePrint Cleanse (it’s like Gatorade, but without the dyes and sugar). She also recommends detox bath treatments from Pursoma – they’re made from whole, raw and organic materials like French sea salt and Loire Valley Clay. If you’ve had a seriously heavy dose of holiday cheer in December, consider making January your month to try a 30-day liver detox.
The best luxury hangover cures in the world for NYE: Pursoma Detox Bath. Courtesy Photo.
Along similar lines, The Adventurous Globe-Trotter says: “My favorite’s kombucha,” a probiotic tea that can be consumed straight up or used as an ingredient in a morning cocktail. She also recommends “miso soup for breakfast; 2 Advil; and 2 Nalgene bottles of water.”
10. h2o – and also just o
A chic friend says it’s all about H2O – she recommends drinking copious amounts of water throughout the evening – one drink, one glass of water. She also suggests ordering on the rocks so that the ice cubes provide some extra hydration.
The sporting crowd seems to like the idea of oxygen bars or an oxygen tank. A few hits from a tank can help regulate the oxygen in your blood and aid in preventing nausea, headaches, and achy muscles. They can also help clear your head. There are ones you can use at-home, modeled after those found in spas.
11. pharmaceuticals
You could also try an over-the-counter “hangover pill” like DeToxx.
And we’ve heard great things about H Proof, the makers of the Anytime You Drink vitamin. These tablets come in three flavors, and are designed to be taken while you drink. Chew two tablets for every five drinks, and you should have no problems the next day.
12. yoga
Adriene of “Yoga with Adriene” fame has a practice for everything, and that includes hangovers! If you find yourself suffering, try out her video to help your body bounce back.
13. kicking it vegas style
The center of all expertise on hangovers and how to make them disappear has to be Las Vegas, right? The people with Ph. D’s in hangover recovery say that IV treatments that include a boost of vitamins like B1 and B12 are the best way to go.
The problem is that you need access to someone who can administer them. If you’re in Vegas, for a little bit of money, Hangover Heaven will send a team to your hotel room with everything you need.
If you’re in the Hamptons or Long Island, you can get a house call from The IV Doctor. Some nurses moonlight providing these IV drips to earn some extra income, so you could also just ask around . . .
14. how to fake it
No time for any of that? Or perhaps you’re not prepared to shell out for an expensive NYE hangover cure. No worries. You can fake sobriety and look – if not fully rested – then at least not fully a wreck. By following these 5 steps from the beauty industry experts:
- Remove your makeup from the night before (’cause you gotta start somewhere)
- Apply toner, a hydrating facial mask, and then eye drops (our Beauty Editor says that these SK II portable face masks are a life-saver). If you want to go all-natural (and stick to a lower price point), try a Burt’s Bees Purifying Sheet mask (full disclosure, the author is on the board of the parent company of Burt’s Bees).
- Reduce eye puffiness further by employing ice cubes or chamomile tea bags.
- Avoid the temptation to use heavy eye-makeup: no liner, no shimmer, keep it simple.
- Throw on some lipstick, a light layer of tinted moisturizer, and a killer pair of sunglasses.
15. do what the doctor says
What do the true experts – the doctors – have to say on this subject?
The over-arching themes are: hydration in the most efficient form possible; a digestive aid of some type (bubbles seem to help); a mild pain reliever (Advil, not Tylenol). And the passage of time with no further alcohol intake.
Other doctor-recommended cures? Take a multi-vitamin to restore nutrients; if you’re a caffeine addict, have a small cup of coffee to avoid a caffeine-deprivation headache on top of the one you already have. Have some simple carbs (plain toast or crackers – not hash browns). And get some rest (intense exercise is a really bad idea because you’re already dehydrated – but a walk might be good as long as you bring water; sleeping it off actually works if you can do it).
16. if all else fails, play some Johnny Cash
Here’s our parting thought.
One of the best suggestions we found when researching this pressing topic was that listening to country music is a helpful restorative (in combination with some of the remedies above). It helps pass the time, it allows you to feel less lonely, and really, you were probably singing loudly the night before anyway, so why not keep it up?
But which tune is most suitable? One writer summed up the criteria brilliantly: “a proper hangover song must have equal parts regret over what you’ve done, and pride that you’re such a badass that you actually did it.”
Who better than Johnny Cash to understand and empathize at a time like this? Check out his rendition of Sunday Mornin’ Comin’ Down. It may not cure you. But it’ll definitely make you feel better.
the best, most effective (and often expensive) luxury hangover cures that work
Those are all the ideas we could find in our quest for answers on the pressing question of the best luxury cures and most effective (and expensive) quick remedies for holiday hangover, especially after NYE. Have you found anything that works well for you? If so, please share it with the world, dear reader. And in the meantime, Happy New Year!
